The first day of the rest of your life
I've often thought about writing on the importance of the present moment. Most probably because sometimes it takes courage to decide now to “build” tomorrow without dwelling too much on the past, or comparing ourselves to others, or overly worrying about future consequences.
Five years ago, my wife and I decided to move to Germany after living in the Geneva region for more than twelve years.
Most friends, family and relatives asked why. Why leave an economically attractive region of incomparable beauty, with its mountains and lakes, your friends, your family, your job, your language, your life, and of course… its delicious cheese?
Because in that present moment, we asked ourselves the question and decided to take the plunge without overthinking the consequences. We considered and anticipated them, of course, but not to the point of giving up on the idea. This exact moment when you think, "I've got a good feeling about this or a great idea, timing is right, it's going to work, let's do it!" and then, either everything falls apart rather quickly because of too many questions and obstacles shaping in your head, or you take the plunge. That's what I want to talk about and that’s what I mean by the importance of the present moment.
This possible change of life felt like all the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle suddenly appeared, and we were the only ones who could see the picture. I've experienced that a few times in my life, leading me to make important decisions, often against the grain of what others might think. I don't regret any of them, despite the difficulties some choices caused. The key isn't whether I made the right choice but that I made a choice, took a decision, and put one foot in front of the other. Indeed, we still had to piece the puzzle together, step by step. I’ll come back to this later.
Back to that precise moment five years ago, it was time for me to reflect on my professional future. I needed to press pause and stop spinning on the hamster wheel. I needed to quit my job before my mental health got seriousely affected. And ultimately identify what I truly wanted to do next. I wrote an article about this episode and other “injuries” that helped me grow. I also wanted to finally learn German, a language I had ignored for too long despite the obvious connections—my wife is German, so are my daughters and many of my close friends.
I'm far from mastering this difficult language, and I still believe that learning a new language at the age of 40 is a true act of vulnerability (I also wrote an article about this). I constantly make mistakes, and speaking other languages in my daily life doesn't help, but I'm hanging in there and moving forward.
It was also a perfect timing for my daughters to change country, culture, language, and school system. And many other reasons, but I won't delve into them here for fear of losing your interest.
In short... my choice, my decision, my reasons, my change, my life.
Reinventing yourself
I remember one of my last day before leaving my job in Geneva. I had dinner with a close colleague, a friend at the time, a friend still today. I told him what I was up to in the coming months with the move in Germany and the reasons of my decision. He said to me: “you need to reinvent yourself my friend”. 5 years after, I still remember that moment like it was yesterday, the tone of his voice, the emotions it created and a big smile on my face.
In my work as a career coach, one of the questions I often hear from my clients is: "Am I doing the right work for me, and should I change direction?" This question may indicates that they are stuck in the wrong career. They know what they want to stop doing and even what they want to start doing more of. What is often less clear is how to make this change and where to start.
In her insightful book Working Identity, Herminia Ibarra discusses the importance of reinventing oneself, especially when facing significant life or career changes. Ibarra's research highlights that “true transformation comes not from introspection alone, but from experimenting with new roles, activities, and relationships.” This aligns with the idea of embracing the present moment and making bold decisions to shape your future.
When you’re on the brink of a big change, it’s crucial to stop doing things just because others expect them of you. Break free from the need to always be right, or to constantly aim for more—whether that’s more success, more approval, or more possessions. This endless pursuit can leave you feeling unfulfilled and disconnected from your true self.
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results”
Instead, focusing on being the Queen or King of your own queen(king)dom. Strive to be fulfilled and excel in what you do, within the space, area, and ecosystem you choose. What ultimately makes you happy? This is the question you should be asking yourself. Happiness and fulfillment come from aligning your actions with your core values and passions, not from external validation or material gains.
Piece the puzzle together
The title of this article underscores the realization that everything can finally change at any moment, sometimes brutally and uncontrollably. In the worst cases, it could be the death of a loved one, learning you have an incurable disease, or, less seriously but still jarringly, losing your job. But let’s not dwell in gloom, because positive changes can also occur just as suddenly, like the birth of a child or winning the lottery ;-). While better, these changes are still transformative and often unexpected.
But things can also change progressively and in the direction you want them to change. In that context, creating new habits that align with your vision is essential. These habits can help you sustain the changes you want to make and ensure that your reinvention is successful. Whether it’s learning a new skill, networking with people in your desired field, or simply setting aside time each day to reflect and plan, these small steps can lead to significant transformations over time.
Personally, I've tried to establish certain habits in my life with various objectives and degrees of success. Here's a non-exhaustive list to illustrate my point:
Go for a swim every morning, or at least do some physical or stretching exercises;
Call someone from your network or outside every week and reconnect, build-up on past discussions, ask for advice, suggest ideas, etc
Stop eating before I am completely full (big challenge for me, gourmand and epicurean that I am!).
Call your friends, ask them questions, and listen to their answers. Be there for them as they are there for you, without an agenda—just to give to your loved ones.
Block your calendar two times a week for meetings with yourself and define the purpose of the meeting (e.g., reflect on a particular subject, exercise, take a walk in nature, help someone in need, etc.). Setting aside time for yourself is particularly useful in an overloaded schedule.
I must admit that while I strive to maintain these habits, some weeks I succeed, and other weeks they fall apart. Like everyone else, I have moments of doubt, lack of motivation, and fatigue. I’m not perfect. I also have children and a wife, so I don't have complete control over my schedule. But I’ve come to terms with this, and I’m at peace with it. As a parent, that's very important—a separate topic, but significant in this context.
Ultimately, the real question is: If you want to change something in your life, what is it? And how can you give yourself the means to succeed?
And one key to success is urgency. Now is the moment. Now is the only good moment. Life’s unpredictability makes the present moment the most crucial time to act. Don’t wait for the “right” time. Embrace the present, decide to make the change, and start creating the life you envision. Your happiness and fulfillment depend on the actions you take today.
Additional quotes
A few additional quotes who helped me write this article:
“Nothing is more paralyzing than the idea of limitless possibilities. The idea that you can do anything is absolutely terrifying. Reason why when it comes to creative works , limitation means freedom. You need to place some constraints (habits, routine, etc) on yourself. ”
“The real meaning of a sentence is always after the “but””
“Your brain gets too comfortable in your everyday surroundings. You need to make it uncomfortable. You need to spend some time…among people that do things differently than you.”
Interested about this article? Feel free to contact me here.
I provide coaching and counseling to both private individuals and corporate clients on career, leadership, and development. I also facilitate group workshops with organizations and business schools
I also write blogs on critical topics such as internal mobility, navigating challenging conversations, providing effective feedback, job interviews preparation and personal development.
If you want to speak to me directly, book your free chemistry call here.
Bonus
To conclude this very personal blog, I must confess that the title of this article is heavily plagiarised from a French song by Etienne Daho, which inspired me to write what you've just read. Here are the lyrics (in french, Deepl will help you if you need even some important subtleties are difficult to retranscribe). These lyrics perfectly sum up the message I want to get across...today.
Le premier jour (du reste de ta vie) - Etienne Daho (1998)
Un matin comme tous les autres
Un nouveau pari
Rechercher un peu de magie
Dans cette inertie morose
Clopin-clopant sous la pluie
Jouer le rôle de sa vie
Puis un soir, le rideau tombe
C'est pareil pour tout le monde
Rester debout, mais à quel prix
Sacrifier son instinct et ses envies
Les plus essentielles
Mais tout peut changer, aujourd'hui
Est le premier jour du reste de ta vie
Plus confidentiel
Pourquoi vouloir toujours plus beau
Plus loin, plus haut
Et vouloir décrocher la lune
Quand on a les étoiles
Quand les certitudes s'effondrent
En quelques secondes
Sache que du berceau à la tombe
C'est dur pour tout le monde
Rester debout, mais à quel prix
Sacrifier son instinct et ses envies
Les plus confidentielles
Mais tout peut changer, aujourd'hui
Est le premier jour du reste de ta vie
C'est providentiel
Debout, peu importe le prix
Suivre son instinct et ses envies
Les plus essentielles
Tu peux exploser, aujourd'hui
Est le premier jour du reste de ta vie
Non accidentel
Oui, tout peut changer, aujourd'hui
Est le premier jour du reste de ta vie
Plus confidentiel
Confidentiel
Confidentiel
